Does "boring" really mean "bad"?
So, I saw Chris this weekend, and we had the most AMAZING sex I've ever had in my life! I REALLY MEAN THAT! :D I was so sore afterward! I couldn't sit or walk or even lay down; I just wanted to die :P But it was so worth it. Anyway, Chris and I have a pretty typical sex regimen and it's not that freaky or explorative or anything... As the saying goes, we're "business as usual".
So, I got to thinking that maybe our sex life needed spicing up... You know, some new ideas and all that. So I asked him if he thought our sex life was boring. He said, "Yes, it's boring. But just because it's boring doesn't mean it's bad." At this point, I was confused. He said, "When the sex is bad, it's just bad. Nothing new or exciting is gonna make that go away. But when you're having good sex, who cares if it's boring? Just cuz it's boring doesn't make it bad."
And that got me thinking... As a society, we think that if it's new, it's gotta be good. But I guess Chris put it in a very poignant way, which is to say that if you've had a good blowjob 100 times in exactly the same way, just cuz it happens again doesn't mean it's going to be bad. Interesting idea, no?
However, that doesn't mean I'm totally sold on his idea. So, I would still like some suggestions on how to put a new spin on our bedroom life ;) Sexperts needed! :P
So, I got to thinking that maybe our sex life needed spicing up... You know, some new ideas and all that. So I asked him if he thought our sex life was boring. He said, "Yes, it's boring. But just because it's boring doesn't mean it's bad." At this point, I was confused. He said, "When the sex is bad, it's just bad. Nothing new or exciting is gonna make that go away. But when you're having good sex, who cares if it's boring? Just cuz it's boring doesn't make it bad."
And that got me thinking... As a society, we think that if it's new, it's gotta be good. But I guess Chris put it in a very poignant way, which is to say that if you've had a good blowjob 100 times in exactly the same way, just cuz it happens again doesn't mean it's going to be bad. Interesting idea, no?
However, that doesn't mean I'm totally sold on his idea. So, I would still like some suggestions on how to put a new spin on our bedroom life ;) Sexperts needed! :P
posted by Quyen @ 10:19 AM
7 Comments:
At 11:10 AM ,
grace said...
i'm not giving up my secrets! sheesh. what would steve need me for then :P
boring's not necessarily bad. unless you think boring is bad... then it's bad...
there's something to be said for stability and knowing what your partner likes, though.
a cockring never hurt, either. kidding, kidding :P
At 11:19 AM ,
JK said...
I wouldn't qualify myself as a sexpert, and I obviously wouldn't know what you would consider to be normal sex. Here my 2 cents anyways.
Teasing - The whole stripper idea (look but don't touch)gets most guys going pretty well. Of course once the tease ended, the touching will commence. There is also the option of no touching, and then just seeing how long you youself can hold out before the anticipation gets you.
Sex in different areas - Work, school, shower, kitchen.... all over the place. The higher the risk of being caught the better it will be.
At 11:38 AM ,
Anonymous said...
Gerbils.
Having sex in the back seat of a VW bug.
Handcuffs. Rope. Rebar.
Candlewax and metal hooks.
Then there's the entire plushie thing.
Grapes.
Pimping you out on Sepulveda (or Craigslist)
Beach balls.
Saturday bukkake night.
Sheep.
Frisbees.
The list goes on and on...
At 12:00 PM ,
JK said...
"To get something you've never had, you have to do something you've never done".
At 8:04 PM ,
peachy said...
Go get one of those sex books and see if you can figure out how those positions work. HA!!HA!!
You could always dress up in costumes. You could pull that off. Or perhaps use some of that motion lotion or something. Just ideas...none of them are guaranteed.
At 9:57 PM ,
Kis Lee said...
what's wrong with a little spice? he should be *thrilled* that you want to try different things. like you said, it doesn't have to be a drastic change. start slow and build up...he'll take back what he said. ;)
At 9:03 AM ,
Yankeebob said...
I kind of understand what Chris was saying, but I think boring isn't the right word. Perhaps you have a routine going that works, but boring is bad.
Aside from that, maybe you could try toys or rubbing each other down with baby oil is fun. You get the slippery thing going. If you use the stuff Peachy mentioned, you can get different kinds, like flavors or the kind that gets hotter when you breathe on it.
I had a girlfriend who liked to get a porno and do what the people in the movie were doing. That was fun! We also had an adult board game where with every move you make, there is something new to do with the person you are playing with.
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