Segue to more Blogs

"Hi friend. You too can make Uncle Sam proud some day."
ahem, a-hem! Shouldn't you be in someone else's blog? Or on some commercial where a guy scales a mountain that eerily enough, through the might of the black arts, reflects back the image of several marines? And let me make this clear: I love magic. Lance Burton, David Copperfield, Zamfir the great: all great men.
"Ah.....um......crap. That's the last time I have a pure-syrup slushee's with Bart Simpson and Milhouse." <-- he shuffles away.

Some of you have been wondering: Where have all the blogs gone, which is not unlike Paula Cole's song, Where Have all the Cowboys Gone. One might also find themselves wondering: Where have Quyen's blogs gone? Where are the happy blogs? Or, where has the mountain with the old, wise man gone? I mean, when's the last time you found that old, wise man? I know I've never seen the wilely bastard in my life. For my part, he continues to elude me, and I've come to the conclusion that it must be because his mountain keeps moving all over the place. First the Alps, then the Himalayas, the Appalachians, and so on.

To be serious though, I'll start working on a blog tomorrow. As for your questions, Quyen's been a little down under the weather lately, and although she manages to get through the day, she hasn't the strength to stay up at night writing you guys. Nevertheless, she told me to tell you guys, she loves you! Well, she didn't actually tell me tell me, but it was implied. She has grown somewhat fond of her little blog community.

Finally, let's talk about the sad blogs. Do they mean that only sad things are going on in our lives? By all means: No. There has been quite a bit of good going on too; we just haven't got around to publishing it what with Quyen being ill, and I still working for a research grant/project on improving high school literacy.

So, let me address some concerns before I go on to write any more blogs on the site. Sad things get immediate attention because, as anyone in a relationship knows, they require the same kind of attention and care in real life. As a boyfriend or girlfriend, you have a responsibility to yourself and the other person to organize your thoughts, think of possible solutions, calm down, reflect on your emotions, and discuss things with your partner to resolve the issue or issues. Moreover, writing, like music, allows people to effectively organize their thoughts and emotions, with the added and crucial element of reflection. So powerful and transformative can the writing process be, that most credible therapists recommend it to their patients.

If you happen to read more sad blogs in the future, keep in mind that my goal, and that of Quyen's, is not to illicit sympathy from the blogging community, or to slander each other. In my case, I'm fully aware that this is Quyen's home and blog, and that she cultivated a following far before me. For me to assume that I could garner your sympathy when your allegiance is to Quyen is foolish. And although some might question this: How often do you side with your friends even if the other person has a good story and may have valid complaints? Isn't it almost always the case that we take up the cause of our friends without questioning if they were wrong? Well, Quyen is your friend, and she's a great friend to have ;) By the way, some sympathy would be nice once in awhile from those of you who can spare it :P

The question is: why do I write, and what does one write about in blogs? Again, I write because it helps me sort out thoughts and emotions so that I can better deal with the real-life situation. What do I write about? Well, some of you have complained that it's just not fair, it's not right to talk about "sad things", nor is right to speak about whatever might be troubling in the relationship. Yep, far as some of you are concerned, it has to be all pink roses, ruby-red glasses, and a yellow brick road of happiness as far as the eye can see. Well, let me say this in return: this is a blog. People write about what they're going through in their blogs. Blogs are like journals - you know, those little paper things you put your feelings into? That's why blogs also have a time and date stamp for each entry. They are electronic journals. Who the hell ever heard of a journal you only write happy things in, or a journal in which you purposely avoid talking about your love life? No one, and if you have, let's find some help. Make sure you're not scary, and interview some high school girls. Ask them what they write about in journals: boys, relationships, the extremes of happiness and sorrow.

I apologize to all the excellent blog readers out there, but I just had to address the issue before going on. I got tired of instant messages, or email about how I'm wrong to write what I'm feeling, and should avoid saying anything negative in the future. Messages suggesting I should write blogs that only deal with things from Quyen's perspective. You know, if I could pull that off, they'd call me Quyen. Also, regardless of how much you know or love Quyen, this doesn't mean that what I'm experiencing isn't true or happening to me. Just because you don't like reading it, doesn't make it any less valid or true.

By the way, the last few sad blogs have allowed Quyen and I to get many things off our shoulders and improve the relationship. Although, it's taken several hard bumps along the way, the last few weeks have left us with a more comprehensive picture of who our partner is and the experiences that have shaped him or her. More than ever, we're equipped to succeed and take the relationship to the next level. What that level is, I don't know, but I can tell you that marriage is a serious possibility for the future. ;)